Wednesday, March 27, 2013

The Japanese Word for Socks Could Translate as "Undershoes"

I'm going to warn you before you get to the bottom of this post that there's a photo of a BIG BUG down there.  I wouldn't normally write such a plot spoiler, but my life has been threatened if I don't warn people when I'm going to show them something hideous and potentially psychologically damaging.  Oh, but here's another SPOILER ALERT: the bug is already dead in the photo.

Spring is in the air.  I know I've said that before, and I know it's gloomy and rainy outside right now (and cold!), but I know it's spring now because I bought some new short-socks.  And they're super cute, aren't they?  Especially on my super cute feet!  I got tired of being the only person at work wearing white white socks every single day.  I was starting to feel like an outsider, like we weren't even speaking the same language, all because of my socks.  So I invested in some non-white socks to get myself ahead in the business world.  Plus, when I'm bored, I can play checkers on them.

The socks are juuuuuuuuust barely big enough, when I stretch them as much as they'll stretch, because most Japanese feet don't come in my size.  That's also why I have such a limited selection of shoes to choose from.  Which reminds me, I think I'm going to get some safety shoes tomorrow.  I may have decided which ones, but I'm not going to say which ones until I've bought them because I don't know if the ones I want will still be in stock.  If the store has any in my size at all, they usually only stock one pair at a time.  Of course, it's not like anyone but me is going to buy them in this town.

Here are the other two pairs of socks that came in the three-pack.  I bought them on sale at the drugstore.  Oddly enough this picture was taken on the exact same floor as the picture above.  I don't know why the wood in this picture seems so much more wooden and the one in the picture above seems so much more gray.

So now I have a pair of checkered socks to match all of my moods: happy, angry, and white.  But I'll NEVER tell you which pair goes with which mood.  You'll just have to experience it for yourself.

These are actually some of my most favorite socks I've ever boughten(!) because I've only ever owned one other pair of socks this fancy, and they were merely black-and-white-striped like the Wicked Witch of the East was wearing on that fateful day in 1939 (because I'm not sure whether the Witch had those same socks in the book).





Now before anyone accuses me of just buying cute socks all willy-nilly, with blatant disregard for the gender for which the socks were intended, you should have a gander at the packaging:
Now you see why I'm so happy?  Men's socks don't come this casual in the United States.  And they also don't come in centimeters.  And they also aren't very original.

Now for the moment you've all been waiting for: A BIG BUG!
We found this while spring cleaning at the work facility.  That's my hand, which I tried to include in the photo for size comparison.  However, not only am I a terrible photographer, but I couldn't put my hand near enough to get an accurate size comparison because the thing is horrifying even though it was already dead.  But this specimen is in real life longer than my index finger.  And from what I understand, these little guys are poisonous and also might be attributed to some neurological syndromes.  And as some of my friends know about my ongoing fear of scorpions in my shoes, it turns out you need to check your shoes for these friendly little fellows once it gets warm out.  Oh, and your bed.  As an interesting side note, I plan on quitting my job and begging for my old job back before it gets warm enough to have to consider checking my shoes.

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