Do You Know, How Many Eyes Has Dragon?

Today we were hanging some signs up at work, and we were using double-sided tape to do so.  My coworker (the girl) had some special "sign-hanging" double-sided tape (as opposed to the taping-two-rolls-of-plastic-together-at-the-ends-so-you-can-roll-them-up-together type).  She pulled the package out of her desk and said "Oh look!  It even has instructions in English!" and we all had a good laugh because we all know I can't read English.

But then I really did read it, and this time I had the last laugh, because the English is some of the best (worst!) I've seen yet.  But after reading it and rereading it several times, I determined that there is NO WAY it could have been translated from the Japanese.  It has waaaaaaaay more words than you would get if you translated the Japanese, and there are some words in Japanese that don't even appear in the English version and many many more words in the English version that don't appear in the Japanese version.  If you don't have time to read that whole "Caution," just pay special attention to the following passage:

Just spend your day pondering this passage, which I think beholds a universal truth and an inherent beauty, like the lotus blossom on Walden Pond.